Tuesday, January 11, 2005
"I will not be the first one to speak.
And if he never calls me again,
I'll always think of him fondly-
As an ASSHOLE"
- Carrie, HBO's Sex and the City
Warning: This is a rant-y/whiny post so stop reading if you're not in the mood for any dramatics.
All I wanted was to have just ONE normal day but apparently, in this day and age, ONE day is too freakin' much to ask for.
It just saddens me that the ONE person that you count on the most to be stable and comforting when you're in a really ugly place in your life turns out to be the first one to screw you over. As if I really need more drama in my life!!! The ONE thing that I'm trying to avoid is the same thing that blows-up in my face. I don't even know what the hell I did and wrong and yet I feel like I'm being punished AGAIN! I'm so disappointed but at the same time, I feel that it might've been my fault for expecting too much.
My life is one hell of a rollercoaster ride but of late, it seems more like a bungee jump that has yet to bounce back up. My world is slowly falling apart--in every aspect. It's as if I have no safe place to turn to or to hide under while everything around me crumbles. I'm sick to my stomach just thinking about what else the future might bring because frankly, I'm not so sure how much more I can handle.
I'm scared.
I don't even know what makes people think that I'm strong enough to take things on all by lonesome when really, I feel like I'm ready to break.
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!
Okay, so much for the drama... I must pull myself together and get out of this state.
My Supah-visor is flying the coop! Yes, he is ready to spread his wings to horizons far and beyond. While this may not be a good thing for me, I sincerely wish him well. And as an homage':
Carrie: Maybe I can't leave New York. I don't know how I'd do someplace else.
Samantha: Believe me, your fabulousness would translate.
-HBO's Sex and the City
Take care and be well lola!!!:)
unleashed by.:: v ::. at
5:35 PM
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