Thursday, February 17, 2005
We're finally HOME!!!
unleashed by.:: v ::. at
6:18 PM
The SECRET is out!
Yes, my blog is no longer a secret.. no longer something that I hold dear and near to my heart because of the comfort it brings when I am able to lash out at the world when I am hurting--when the person I love the most breaks my heart over and over and over again...
But I think that I shall continue to write, in the hopes that this will cure the melancholia that I feel. I am so f@%*ing depressed...why won't anybody believe me? Why won't somebody come and save me?
It's Velentine's day.. but what the hell is that suppsoed to mean to me anyway?! It's a "holiday" especially designed to push desperate and lonely people off the deep end while Hallmark and chocolate factories and flower farms move in for the kill. I think I'm extra sad because it's Valentine's day... I don't quite know how to explain it, especially under the circumstances that I am currently in.
Okay, enough of the drama. I feel sick to my stomach as it is.. I need not wallow in more drama as I am quite satiated for ten lifetimes over.*** *** ***On a lighter note, I have been quite a movie buff in the past few weeks. I have seen:
1. Elektra
2. Meet the Fockers
3. Assault on Precint 13
4. A Very Long Engagement
5. Spanglish
6. I Heart Huckabees
7. In Good Company
8. Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
No too good considering I took up film in college but good enough considering how many movies have passed me by in the last year.
With Virramall closed (or has it re-opened?), I am glad to have found a new "pirate" haven where they have absolutely no qualms about displaying their goods and where you can actually verify if the movie you're buying is really a DVD copy. Coolness! I can't wait to get a fresh batch of new and old movies to watch.*** *** ***I arrived pretty late at the office again today. Not the best way to start the week, especially with Chris finally fleeing the Factory. I definitely didn't sign-up for all the changes that are going to happen but what can I do, right? It's not as if I have the option to not-work. Hence, I am left to deal with the "autism" that becomes my environment. whoooooopeee!
(Chris, I hatechu! Ihatechu! Ihatechu! This place is sooooo quiet and sad without you... I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone or Eerie Indiana or something like that..hehehe)*** *** ***From my broken heart to yours, I leave you all with this... Happy Valentine's Day!
When it comes to relationships, maybe we're all in glass houses, and shouldn't throw stones because you can never really know. Some people are settling down, some are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.
-Carrie, HBO's Sex and the City
unleashed by.:: v ::. at
6:49 PM
Harry: I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out.
I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich.
I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts.
I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes.
And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night.
And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve.
I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.- Billy Crystal to Meg Ryan, When Harry Met Sally
So, needless to say things are going pretty well in that department. I'm not counting my chickens just yet though but at least with everything going on in my life right now, that's one thing less to think off and worry about. He's being so sweet and loving and characteristically/ uncharacteristically (go figure) open about how his feelings. I'm sure we're both just really tired of fighting.
I knocked some sense into my own head hence-while I am still quite anxious about things--I am no longer an excessively hormonal puffalump--well, maybe just a puffalump but I'm trying to do something about that too.
I took the train home last Monday and this couple caught my attention because they were uber sweet and all over each other. I was a bit put off at first but when I saw how he would look at her, right before he would kiss her (and he did kiss her a record number of times considering there were just about 3 stops from the time I got on the train), I couldn't help but feel jealous. It seems as if I haven't seen that look in sooooo long and I don't think I've seen him that in love with me since God knows when. It's sad. Maybe this is just my hormones talking but then again maybe not.
Every girl, at one point in her life, has dreamt of becoming a princess or at least to be treated like one. To this day, that's still what I want. I want the romance (minus the drama) and I want the whole production/ musical extravaganza. I want to be swept off my feet, dammit! Not just once in the bluest of blue moons but everyday. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not high-maintenance. I'm actually very easy to please...although not easy to figure out.
Had lunch with my co-Factory workers (that's what everyone seems to be calling it anyway!) and I felt conflicted with emotions. On one hand, I think I'm going to get along with the new kid on the block (I think we have to wait for the announcement before we can call him by name) and while this whole transition period is going to be crazeeee, I know that we'll make it. On the other hand, my Supah-visor only has 7 days left in this crummy ol' Factory. *sigh* Yes, he'll probably be back for consultation and what-not but it's still going to be different--very different.
Chris, Ayoko pa mag-emote! So no "goodbyes" or no "go team" messages for you just yet but thanks for the motivation. I needed that. Next week nalang tayo mag-drama. hehe :)
unleashed by.:: v ::. at
6:13 PM